The "Thin" Pill: Would You Take It?

I read an interesting article in the paper the other day. Apparently, a team of scientists at Harvard University could be close to developing a “thin” pill:

This team of scientists found that by reducing the function of “klotho” in mice (a protein found in both mice and humans that helps regulate the body’s sensitivity to insulin) could turn obese mice with high blood sugar into lean mice with low blood sugar.

Dr. Shawkat Razzaque, one of the researchers, was quoted as saying, “We’re suggesting that if we can find a way to target klotho in humans, we may be able to reduce obesity.”

Throughout the years, many overweight people have dreamed of the day when we could simply take a “thin pill” and never have to worry about being fat again. Suppose this pill were actually available right now …Would you take it?

I have to admit, much as I have come to love and accept myself, I would definitely be tempted. Thinness in a pill … so convenient, so easy! The whole idea started me thinking … what would life be like in a world without fat people?

Comedians and morning radio show hosts would seriously have to start coming up with some new material. They wouldn’t be able to go for the cheap fat jokes anymore.

Bullies and ignorant people would have to cross fat people off their insult list. No more calling anyone fatass, fat bitch, or fat bastard. There wouldn’t be any fat people around for them to pick on.

Diet book authors and diet centers like Jenny Craig and Weight Watchers would be out of business … which would also mean that D-list actors like Valerie Bertinelli, Kirstie Alley, and Carrie Fisher would actually have to get real jobs, as there wouldn’t be any need for their “spokesperson” services.

The food companies would take a serious hit in revenue if the “diet” label was no longer necessary on their frozen foods, soda pop, snacks, etc. Therefore, the stock market would be seriously affected. Chaos would ensue on Wall Street, affecting the entire world economy.

And finally … people would be forced to recognize us for who we are. Once that cloak of fat was off our bodies and they felt that we were finally worthy of their attention, they would probably gape at us in awe and say things like, “You are so beautiful! And smart! How come I never noticed before?”

If these scientists actually do come up with a thin pill, the potential for profits would be astronomical. It would definitely give tobacco, booze, and the porn industry a run for their money. And you can bet this pill wouldn’t be cheap, although most people would be more than willing to mortgage their houses, cash in their retirement funds, and go deep into debt, all for the privilege of finally being thin. Hell … THIN people who keep thinking they’re fat would be stampeding for this pill!

So: Would you take a thin pill? And if you did, would you feel a nagging reservation about it, or guilt for “giving in”? Would you feel as if you were betraying yourself … as if you were a coward, giving in to the demands of a superficial society?

The world would not be without fat people. There are many brave fat activists -- and some diehard non-conformists -- who would probably say: Hell no, I wouldn’t take that pill! I would never give in to the demands of our fat-hating society! I love myself exactly the way I am and I’m staying that way!

Quite honestly, I’m not sure what I’d do. I’d love to say that I’d be strong, that I’d stay true to myself, that I wouldn’t give in to the demands of a superficial society. I definitely know that if I did take the pills, while part of me would be admiring my silhouette in my skintight skinny jeans, another part of me would feel guilty, as if I had caved in to the pressures of society.

Do we want to be thin for ourselves? Or do we want to be thin because other people want us to be thin?

It’s quite a complicated issue, if you really think about it.