Worthwhile Resolutions for 2012

Hello, my darling readers. I hope all of you have been enjoying the holidays, eating some great food, spending time with family and friends, and laughing, smiling, and partying. Although I don’t believe we should wait for special occasions to celebrate, this is a time of year to really live it up and have fun. It’s also a great time sit back and reflect, and think about what you want to achieve. Is your life going the way you want it to? Are there some improvements you can make that will make your life better?

So many of us have made that typical resolution: I am going to lose weight this year. I am going to get into that goddam bikini/pair of jeans/little black dress. What we are really saying when we make resolutions like this is: I don’t like myself the way I am. Therefore, I will make people like me through the way I look, and maybe that will make me feel better about myself.

Can you see how a resolution like that is fraught with failure? If you don’t like yourself the way you are, the most important thing you need to do is be kind to yourself. None of us is perfect. Even the most beautiful women in the world say they feel ugly and unsexy at times. Physical perfection is not the key to happiness. The key to happiness is being okay with who you are and how you look. It is also incredibly sexy when a woman truly loves herself and is confident about who she is.

Granted, that is not an easy task in this society, where women like us are constantly being told that we don’t look good enough, that we need to improve the way we look, that we need to conform or else. We are told not to complain about being treated badly, because in order to be treated well, we need to be thin.

Please tell me you know what bullshit that is. Please tell me you get angry at even the thought of an edict like this. Please tell me that you love and respect yourself exactly the way you are.

I believe there are several resolutions that serve us all much better than the traditional I-need-to-lose-weight resolution. Read through them and see if you can benefit by applying any of them in your life this year.

I resolve to love myself exactly the way I am, inside and out.

I resolve to treat my body and myself with love, respect, and kindness.

I resolve to allow only positive or like-minded people to get close to me.

I resolve to put up an impenetrable barrier between me and negativity. Only positivity is allowed to enter my world to any significant degree.

I resolve to object in whatever way I see fit whenever someone shames me, abuses me, or crosses a boundary without my permission.

I also resolve to object in whatever way I see fit whenever I see another large person get treated in a negative or abusive way.

I resolve to protect myself and to always trust my intuition to guide me in every situation.

I resolve to respect, nurture, and take care of my body by feeding it healthy foods and moving regularly.

I resolve to let myself eat whatever my body craves and not beat myself up for doing so.

I resolve to be aware of the reasons I am eating. If I feel that I am eating when I am not hungry, I resolve to take a step back and ask myself why.

I resolve to get my needs met – whatever they are. If I need love, I will find love. If I need a friend, I will talk to a friend. If I need emotional support, I will look for it or ask for it.

I resolve to say all the things I need to say, even if they are not popular or if I feel they will not be well received. I may tailor what I say in certain situations (like at work, for example), but I will find the most effective way to express my thoughts.

I resolve not to take life so seriously and just relax and laugh if things don’t go the way I expect them to. Life is an adventure to be lived, which means failure at times. I resolve not to let failure kill my spirit.

I resolve to find the romantic partner I have always dreamed of (if I am looking for one). I resolve to pay very careful attention to my instincts, which will allow me to judge whether a person deserves to be my romantic partner and if he or she is capable of fulfilling my romantic needs. If my inner signals are giving me the green light, I will go for it with gusto! If they are flashing red, I will run like hell!

I resolve to look at myself in the mirror every day and be happy with who I see. If I want to make changes to my appearance, like wear makeup or certain clothes, I will do it! I will not wait “until I am thin” to allow myself to be pretty. I will embrace my beauty and show it off to the world.

I hope that you find these resolutions helpful, my dear readers. I hope you use any or all of them to navigate your way through 2012 and all the years to come.

I want to say a very deep, sincere thank you to all of my readers for continuing to read this blog. I love every single one of you. I wish all of you a wonderful, happy, beautiful New Year, and I will see you in 2012! J