Rob Ford: Toronto's Poster Boy for Fat Hate

Few things bore and frustrate me as much as politics. Basically, I lump all politicians into one general category: corrupt, overpaid, underachieving thieves who lie every time their lips move.

So this blog post is not about politics. It’s about a politician where I live, in the city of Toronto.

Rob Ford became mayor of Toronto in 2010. Since his induction as mayor, his critics have been relentless. They claim it’s his politics and his financial cuts that they don’t like. But I think what really galls them is the fact that he’s fat.

Rob Ford weighs over 300 pounds. How did such a fat man ever get to be mayor of Toronto? Fat people aren’t supposed to get prestigious jobs like that! People probably scratch their heads when they ask themelves that question. I’ve asked it myself, when I see all the rampant fat hate Ford has been subjected to.

The ridicule began (naturally) during the mayoral election. While ridicule and public embarrassment among opponents in political campaigns is a given, the ridicule Ford received has been beyond insipid and juvenile. There were all kinds of demeaning, insulting images of him with either a pig head or a pig body (we’re talking grade school humor here):

Once elected mayor, Toronto’s notoriously left-wing NOW magazine produced this crude and lewd cover to commemorate the occasion:

That isn't Ford's body, by the way .... just his head superimposed on another fat guy's body. It's nothing new; the media has been lopping off fat people's heads for decades and either ignoring them completely or sticking them on other bodies as a joke. I guess the editors at NOW figured, close enough.

I have lived in Toronto for most of my life, and I can never recall a mayor receiving such hateful, intense criticism or deliberate humiliation before – and certainly not for how he looked. This, despite the fact that one of our mayors, Mel Lastman, was definitely no beauty, and whose claim to fame before becoming mayor was his clownlike commercials for his furniture store, Bad Boy.

Our previous mayor David Miller (directly before Ford) was definitely deserving of intense criticism when he sloppily mishandled a garbage strike that was a total disaster for the city. But he got off pretty lightly, because he looked like this:

Yeah, that smoulderingly sexy Kennedy vibe gets ‘em every time.

Our current mayor can do no right, though. He has been harassed and ridiculed from day one, simply because of his weight. Respect for him as a human being (never mind a public servant) is simply non-existent. In one notorious incident that backfired quite dismally for the CBC, comedienne Mary Walsh felt perfectly justified accosting him AT HIS HOME (in his driveway) one morning on his way to work, causing him to call 911 and supposedly cuss and swear (allegations that later proved to be untrue).

Would any rational person blame him for cussing and swearing, though? I would’ve spat in her face if she’d pulled that crap with me. (Maybe that’s one reason I’m not mayor.) He handled the situation with dignity and class, much to the CBC's chagrin.

I’ve watched all the disrespect, insults, humiliation, and ridicule about his weight since the election, and depending on the incident, I’ve been mildly to moderately disgusted. A lot of people say: Well, he signed up for this. It’s part of public life. The other day, however, the fat hate displayed towards Ford plummeted to the lowest level I have seen yet.

Part of it was due to poor judgement on Ford’s part. He does have a tendency to invite controversy. In January 2012, he and his brother Doug undertook a “weight loss challenge” in which both of them vowed to lose 50 lbs. by June. Why did Ford do this? Was he truly looking to change his size and lifestyle for his own reasons? Or was he simply caving in to the public pressure and scrutiny about his weight? Did he think people would start to like him if he showed that he was “making an effort”?

Whatever his reasons, it was an incredibly stupid move, because as any dieter knows, DIETS DON’T WORK. They are guaranteed to fail sooner or later, and he should have known that when it started failing, his detractors would be even more critical of him than before.

Ford’s progress on his diet has been standard. After an initial quick few pounds dropped at the beginning of the diet (water weight), he has been making slow progress down the scale. Now he has started to yo-yo. He started his diet at 330 pounds. The other day (about four months since the diet began), he weighed in at 312, a pound up from his last weigh-in.

Here’s what happened that made me so disgusted. Some woman videotaped him walking into a Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurant to buy dinner. Her justification for this breach of privacy was “If you’re not committed to the diet that you committed to … how can you be committed to the taxpayers of Toronto and making changes in Toronto?”

Meanwhile ... Are you ready for the punchline? The woman was feeding KFC to her toddler at the time. There’s great parenting skills for ya. I’d love to videotape her doing a diaper change … probably all kinds of diaper rash (and who knows what else) on that poor kid’s behind. This woman is supposedly a child care worker. If you watch the video, you'll hear her laughing her ass off when she sees Ford entering the KFC, ridiculing him. Surely you'd want to hire this compassionate "child care worker" to look after your child, wouldn’t you?

In case you’re wondering, her justification for feeding greasy junk food to her child was this: “I got a four-piece chicken, gravy, and french fries, and I enjoyed every bit of it. … I know teaching my child to eat french fries at KFC – that’s not fine. But you know what? I didn’t commit to a weight loss challenge. He did.”

Crotchety Toronto Sun columnist Peter Worthington’s comments on the incident incensed me even more. Here’s a sampling of his take on the matter: “At his last weigh-in, he went from 311 pounds to 312 pounds. That’s not much of an advertisement for lunches of rye crisp and celery.”

Has this ignorant fool ever been on a diet in his life? Does he have any clue about the body’s metabolism, how it battles to fight starvation, and the incredible difficulty in taking weight off no matter how little you eat? Obviously not. But if you think this was the last of his ignorance … you’re mistaken. The old boy was just getting warmed up.

“Trim your diet, Rob, if you’re serious. It’s not hard. … Considering his size, Ford has no aversion to consuming medium-rare steaks and KFC, as evidenced by a recent video posted to YouTube. He surely didn’t get so ‘robust’ by concentrating on crackers and veggies. … who cares if the mayor is a tubby, addicted to cream puffs and malted milk shakes.”

I love how judgmental people get when they feel they have a free pass to judge others. They’re usually people who have never had a weight problem in their life … and that’s why they feel entitled to spout off so bombastically. It’s really scary how uneducated, ignorant, and just plain mean people are about weight … but it’s certainly not news. I just happened to get a real local taste of it this past week.

If you’re not a fan of Rob Ford’s politics, that’s one thing. If you dislike his proposed cuts, his demeanor, his attitude towards the working class and cyclists, and what some believe is his lack of support towards Toronto’s gay community, you (as a citizen) have the right to criticize him for those things.

But SHUT THE FUCK UP about his weight. The man is a human being. Whether he loses it or not is his business, NOT yours. As soon as you utter one detrimental word about his weight, your intelligence disappears and you reveal yourselves for the fat-hating bigots you are.

Well, that’s it for now from lovely, progressive Toronto, home of the thin and privileged and home of one lone fat and privileged (maybe not so privileged) beleaguered mayor. I shudder to think … what if our mayor happened to be a 300-pound woman instead of a man? Something tells me that the abuse Rob Ford undergoes on a regular basis would be nothing compared to the hate she would receive.

Defy Stereotypes

Human beings seem to feel a great need to put each other in boxes, which is why stereotypes exist for all different classifications of people – people of different ethnicities, income levels, and sexual preferences, just to name a few. We BBWs are no exception. Plenty of stereotypes have been foisted on us by the masses.

All people (including thin ones) adopt some mannerisms and traits of certain stereotypes occasionally. There is always some truth in every stereotype, which is what gives it power and why people get so angry at being stereotyped. People don’t mind being associated with the positive aspects of a stereotype nearly as much as the negative aspects. However, the belief that anybody embodies one stereotype completely is just silly. Human beings are very complex creatures, and we all have a vast array of traits that combine to make us uniquely who we are.

It's tempting to dismiss anyone who believes these stereotypes as ignorant fools, but there are also many well-meaning, otherwise intelligent people who believe them as well, simply because they have been brainwashed by the media, the medical establishment, or simply by the attitudes of people around them.

Here are a few of the stereotypes most commonly associated with BBWs:

The Wallflower

This BBW is usually perceived as sitting in a corner looking lonely and miserable, watching her friends have fun and live life while it passes her by. She is quiet as a mouse and rarely calls attention to herself because of her chronic low self-esteem. She is the perpetual bridesmaid living the cliché Always the bridesmaid, never the bride. (Positive aspects: Modest, humble, nice, sweet, kind.)

The Jokester

This BBW is outgoing, gregarious, and extroverted. She seems to be extremely confident and uses her outgoing nature to “compensate” for her size. She is the ideal party guest. Everyone likes her and she has no shortage of friends. However, when it comes to her love life, the laughter stops and she gets depressed because no one takes her seriously as a love prospect. (Positive: Fun, exciting, interesting.)

The Frump

This is probably the most offensive stereotype associated with BBWs. This is a BBW who is perceived as sloppy, doesn’t take care of her appearance, wears asexual, unattractive clothing, and doesn’t give a shit what she looks like. She lives in sweat pants, sweatshirts, and T-shirts. Oh yeah, and she eats a lot. Constantly. All day long. (Positive: Down to earth, practical, not superficial.)

The Ballbuster

This BBW is loud, rude, brash, aggressive, and doesn’t hesitate to speak her mind. She doesn’t care what you or anyone else thinks of her because she is angry at the world and goddammit, she’s going to let you know it. (Positive: Confident, smart, brave, well-read or well-informed.)

The Mother/Nurse/Caretaker

This is a BBW whose life is dedicated to everyone but herself. If she’s a wife and mother, she lives for her husband and kids. (Her husband is often abusive, berates her for her weight, and has a skinny girlfriend on the side, which she tolerates.) If she’s a nurse, she’s devoted to her patients. If she’s a caretaker (taking care of her elderly parents, perhaps), she’s devoted to them. She has no life or interests outside the people she is devoted to. (Positive: Nurturing, caring, gentle, warm, kind.)

The Cook

This BBW is renowned for her cooking. Everyone wants to come to her house for the holidays because she puts out the most unbelievable spread imaginable. Most of all, she is an incredible baker who specializes in the most mouth-watering desserts. You won’t find anything low-calorie or low-fat in her pantry or fridge. She is all about food and when you’re finished eating one plate, she’s quick to freshen it with another helping. (Positive: Talented, creative, pleasure-oriented.)

Do you recognize yourself in any of these stereotypes? Can you see aspects of several of them in yourself? As I said above, everyone adopts the traits of each stereotype from time to time. For instance, I totally adopted The Wallflower stereotype for many years, and I’m sure many people see aspects of The Jokester in me from time to time as well.

Food and sex are crucial aspects of these BBW stereotypes. People associate us with food because they think our lives revolve around eating, and negatively with sex because we’re usually seen as too big or unattractive to partake in it. All too often, we’re perceived as gluttons and spinsters by the majority.

Thankfully many BBWs have broken the mold and shown the world just how ludicrous and misleading these stereotypes can be: women like Velvet D’Amour and Beth Ditto have shown the world just how gorgeous, sexy, and confident plus-sized women can be – not to mention leaving The Frump stereotype in the dust where it belongs. Women like Kelly Bliss and Jeanette DePatie have demonstrated that plus-sized women do care about their health, exercise, and take care of themselves.

I urge all of you to show the world just how erroneous and misleading the negative aspects of these stereotypes are. Embrace the positive aspects: the gutsiness and outspokenness of The Ballbuster, the fun-loving nature of The Jokester, and the kindness of The Mother/Nurse/Caretaker. We big girls cannot be simplified by such narrow descriptions. Let’s show the world just how complex and multifaceted we are.

How do you show the world that you are not a stereotype? What do you do to make the world see how unique you are, how you can’t be pigeonholed into any one of these stereotypes? Find out what it is and keep doing it.

I hope to see this stereotype regularly acknowledged one day – not just by other women in the fat community, but the global community:

The Fabulous Fat Girl

A large woman who walks proudly, who turns heads with her own unique style, who speaks confidently and enjoys all aspects of her life equally. A woman who does not need anyone’s approval to realize how amazing she is.

If you’re lucky enough to feel this way already, pass it on.

Backlash! Part 2 -- Haters and Harassers

Now on to Part 2, which is about the harassment I received for this blog.

I understand that people disagree and when people disagree, emotions get involved and conversations can get heated. But what happened here truly alarmed and disgusted me. I saw the worst of human nature unfold right before my eyes.

As I said yesterday, I received both positive and negative feedback for this blog. Some of the negative feedback was beyond negative. It was hateful, malicious, and incredibly ugly.

I ended up quitting one of the groups I belonged to on Facebook because of the unrelenting barrage of negative comments. It wasn’t the first time that happened to me there. This particular group has a reputation for its radical and extremist views. I know of at least one other person who they publicly harassed after a Facebook disagreement. One of their favorite tactics is to enlist group members who have access to your Facebook page to report back on anything you may have said regarding them – kind of like the informant network we all remember from high school – and then flaunt it in your face by quoting you, as if to say nyah nyah, we got you! These are grown and supposedly educated women who function at the psychological level of conspiratorial 14-year-olds. I was called a misogynist. Someone also said that it wasn’t a stretch to infer by my words that I was saying women who dress provocatively deserve to be raped.

While there are perfectly reasonable people in this group as well, it is pretty much run by the aggressive radicals who regularly post there. It is not a group interested in honest discussion and an exchange of ideas. It’s a group where if you don’t toe the line and agree with their views, you will be vociferously targeted and attacked … which is really funny, because here is their group description from their Facebook page:

This is a fat positive community space to discuss fat related topics, size acceptance and talk about our personal experiences. (Hmm … talk about our personal experiences, what do you know?) …. No topics are out of bounds. Only rules are: No personal attacks. (Oh my God, I have to stifle my laughter there. Actually I believe that IS the rule there.) … It is fine to talk about any fat/SA related projects you are doing or books you are writing/have written etc.

Sounds pretty warm and welcoming, doesn’t it? Well, here’s what I learned from being a member of this group. If you do not agree with the majority of posters in this group – and as I said, the dominant ones who regularly post there are radicals who seem to live within the confines of a multisyllabic, dusty textbook – you will be attacked and targeted. They will surround you like a pack of wolves.

Many of them demanded that I back up my assertions with studies and statistics, but that is not my job and it is not my responsibility. It may make my case stronger if I do so, but as a blogger, it’s not necessary for me to do so. I am merely sharing my opinion with people. Do I need to define the word “opinion”? Okay, here it is, from Merriam Webster:

A belief stronger than impression and less strong than positive knowledge …

And here’s the definition of the word “belief”, again from Merriam Webster:

Conviction of the truth of some statement or the reality of some being or phenomenon especially when based on examination of evidence.

I’m not stating that my opinions are unequivocally true for everyone, but they are true for me. It is my right to share my experiences and opinions, and I have chosen to do that publicly with this blog. I realize that not everyone is going to agree with me, and that is perfectly fine. But just because you don’t agree with me doesn’t mean that I should be vilified. I choose to write these blogs and make these videos. You choose to read this blog and watch these videos.

If what I say is so offensive to you, the solution is simple: Don’t read the blog. Don’t watch the videos.

Another very important point that has been missed so far is that there seems to be some confusion about what a blogger is, and the responsibilities of a blogger to her readers.

Let me define the word “blog”. Again, from Merriam Webster:

A web site that contains an online personal journal with reflections, comments, and often hyperlinks provided by the writer.

Here’s another definition from wikipedia:

A blog is a personal journal published on the world wide web consisting of discrete entries (posts) … Blogs are usually the work of a single individual … Many blogs provide commentary on a particular subject; others function as more personal online diaries … The ability of readers to leave comments in an interactive format is an important part of many blogs.

These definitions are crucial. Many people accused me of acting like I am an authority or academic on the subject of fat, and I have never purported to be such. I am an average fat woman sharing my opinions and experiences with other average fat women, and hoping that what I share on this blog will be helpful to other fat women. I never said that I was an authority on fatness. I am an authority on one thing only: MY OWN EXPERIENCE.

I started this blog because I believe that in my 47 years on this earth, I have acquired enough knowledge and insight about life as a fat woman to possibly benefit some other people. I realize that my personal views may not benefit everyone … but I do want to share them with the people it does benefit.

That’s why I do this. To sincerely reach out and hopefully help people, encourage them, and make them feel like they’re not alone.

Life as a fat person is hard. I think it’s important that we support and encourage each other, and my intent has never been to demean, degrade, insult, judge, shame, or ridicule anyone (except haters, of course).

The radical group was not the only group where I encountered harassment. I was raked over the coals on another group page as well. One of the members emailed me to harass me, and I later discovered that she posted those private emails on the group page for everyone to see (which I believe is illegal). That group and person have both been reported to Facebook. I’m not sure if anything will come of it – if they will be suspended or reprimanded -- but I wasn’t about to ignore it.

Obviously, that kind of behaviour proves that the response I received went beyond disagreement. It was a personal attack. My dear friend Raqui of Large in Charge Radio and magazine quit this group herself when she witnessed this. She took a stand and left because she would not tolerate their behaviour. This is what she said to them before she left the group:

While I understand everyone has their opinion posting a private conversation here that you are having with Gabriela (a former member) is not necessary. Why are you harrassing her and now posting it for the whole group to see. You dont like what she said fine take it up with her but to do this is wrong and fat on fat hate is not what I expected from this group. I respect her thoughts and all of yours but this is wrong. I cant continue to be a member here if this is what is going to happen every time someone says something you dont like. What happens when I say something no one likes will I be treated like this as well? What happens when any of us say something that everyone else doesnt like? This is not fat love or self love. This is hate I cant remain here. I loved being here but I cant continue.

I admit that I was a little disappointed by the lack of public support I received, although I understand why. Make no mistake – I heard from plenty of people who completely agreed with my point of view and emailed me privately or commented on other pages to let me know. But most of them stayed silent when they saw the bullying taking place. Even though I was disappointed by their silence, I understood. It’s the intimidation factor. It’s like being back on the playground when you’re a kid, seeing some other kid getting beaten up. How many of us intervened, tried to do the right thing, and help the kid being bullied? It’s fear. People don’t want to be subjected to the same treatment, so they do and say nothing.

Those of you who think that the lack of public response supporting my point of view means that your views were in the majority are wrong. I heard from PLENTY of people who agreed with me and simply wanted to protect themselves and stay clear of the carnage.

This kind of intimidation and bullying behaviour runs counter to everyone’s basic right to free speech. In some places (like these groups on Facebook), free speech is simply a platitude. Speech is only free if you toe the party line. Step outside its boundaries and God help you.

In closing, I want to let all of the bullies know that people like you have not -- and will not -- silence me. I seriously considered packing in my blog and quitting after this incident because I was so disgusted by the abuse I received. Here I was trying to help people, and this is what I got for it? But several people encouraged me and told me not to quit, and deep down, I knew I never would. I’m a fighter. I always have been. I’m not a physical fighter, but I’m a psychological fighter. In my life, many people have tried to beat me down, intimidate me, and force me to acquiesce to their beliefs. To those people – thin and fat – I have said and I will continue to say: YOU WISH.

You don’t have to agree with me. You don’t have to like me. You don’t have to read my blog and watch my videos. But you’re completely deluded if you think that you can tell anyone how to think or what to believe. And you’re also deluded if you think that you have stopped me.

I remember a comment I got from a person in one of these groups on another occasion. She actually had the gall to say that she didn’t consider me a writer. I found the arrogance and snobbiness of that hilarious. Because SHE didn’t consider me a writer means I’m not a writer? I’ve got news for that woman. A writer is someone who WRITES. Period. You don’t need any other qualifications than that. It helps if you write consistently, and since I have been writing since I was twelve years old, I guess that makes me pretty consistent. You might not think I’m a GOOD writer, and that’s your opinion, but your critique doesn’t make me any less a writer. In the end, I’ll be the one with the book deal and a big smile on my face.

One last note:

Recently, I made another video called Women vs. Women, Rivalry, and Dynamics in the Fat Community. Maybe I had some kind of premonition, because the timing is pretty coincidental. Go back and watch it. (The link is below.)

What happened here is a textbook example of what I was talking about in that video and it proves my point yet again. There is a certain portion of the fat community that is extremely cliquish and elitist, who believe that you need a degree in order to have a valid or legitimate opinion, and who believe that in order for your opinion to matter, it has to receive their blessing.

That is simply horseshit.

Over and out.

Backlash! Part 1 -- My Apology

Today’s blog is going to be a little different. It’s going to be a blog about a blog … specifically a blog I wrote last week. It ignited a HUGE amount of response, both positive and negative … and the response was so overwhelming that it needs to be addressed.

I got a TON of feedback from last week’s blog. Some of it was positive, and some of it was extremely negative. Some of it was so negative that I actually had to quit a group I was a part of on Facebook because of the reception I received there. The ferocity and relentlessness of the negativity really concerned and alarmed me, and I am going to be addressing the harassment in Part 2 of this blog because it is a subject in itself. It’s a serious issue that has to be dealt with and I intend to deal with it.

But for now, I want to do something more important.

The first thing I want to do is apologize. I received a lot of feedback from BBWs who read my blog and watched my video and told me they were offended by my choice of words, and by the way I chose to express my views, and for that, I am truly sorry. My intention was not to insult, judge, degrade, or demean any BBWs for their right to pose for pictures in whatever manner they choose. I also want to apologize to any men I may have offended. I still stand by my belief that most men who respond to these kinds of pictures are not primarily looking for a relationship, but I admit that is a bit of a generalization. No, not all of you are just ogling, grinning lechers … and I also know that appreciating the beauty of the female body does not preclude you from treating women well. So I apologize if I offended any of you as well.

The subject of BBWs, their bodies, their appearance, and the way that they present themselves is a HUGE topic. A VAST topic. My blog was a mere fraction of that topic.

This is what my blog was about: SINGLE BBWs WHO POSE PROVOCATIVELY IN ORDER TO ATTRACT A MATE. That was the subject of my blog. But the response I received turned it into something completely different.

I was accused of saying that BBWs shouldn’t dress a certain way, look a certain way, or act a certain way. I said nothing of the kind.

THIS IS WHAT MY BLOG WAS ABOUT: Single BBWs who pose provocatively in order to attract a mate. But very few people chose to focus on my topic. They saw or heard my words, interpreted them in their own way, and accused me of saying all kinds of things.

I take responsibility for some of that misinterpretation, which is why I started this blog with an apology. I realize that I could have chosen my words better and I was probably not as careful as I should have been to make sure that my meaning was clear and understood.

My blog was not about a BBWs right to pose provocatively if she wants to … what kind of clothes she chooses to wear … whether she wants to be monogamous or not … or if she even wants a mate.

It was about BBWs WHO POSE PROVOCATIVELY IN ORDER TO ATTRACT A MATE and my belief … MY BELIEF! … that it does not benefit them.

I got positive feedback. I heard from many people who totally agreed with me. I also heard from people who totally disagreed with me, but who were unemotional about it and did not infer anything offensive from my point of view. Then I heard from people of a whole different breed, who disagreed with me and who were extremely angry … who felt that I was judging them and that I was being insulting and demeaning.

I heard from women who said that they had posed provocatively and met their soul mates as a result. I heard from women who said that they had had nothing but great experiences from being open and free with their bodies. To those women, I say: That’s great! I am very happy for you.

I never said that it was impossible to meet a great person by posing provocatively … I said it was unlikely, and I still believe that initiating a great relationship in this way is not the norm. You may disagree with me, but that’s my opinion. That is what free speech is all about. People are entitled to speak their opinions. I speak mine, you speak yours. Neither one of us is right or wrong. We are simply stating OUR personal truths.

There is a wonderful website called Adipositivity.com, which features the work of the very talented photographer Substantia Jones. She photographs large women and often photographs them nude, in sexy poses with their partners, or in just plain sexy poses. I LOVE her work and I think that it is beautiful and brilliant.

I know that some people will call me a hypocrite for saying the Adipositivity photographs are beautiful because of my opinion that it’s unadvisable for a BBW to pose provocatively if she’s looking for a mate. But to me, it’s not the same thing. Let me explain the difference.

I believe that our bodies are sacred things. It’s a little scary to me that this belief has become old-fashioned and archaic to some of you. I believe that it’s especially true for BBW bodies. Why? Because they have been demeaned and degraded by society for so long. We’ve been told that we’re ugly, that we’re not sexy, that we’re not good enough. Obviously, this is untrue. But when you expose your private body parts for no purpose other than to titillate and attract attention, to me that reveals insecurity and a search for acceptance. That is not a BBW who loves herself. That’s a BBW who is using her body in the hopes of finding someone who will love her so that she can finally love herself.

You may disagree with me, but that is my opinion. I know, because I speak from experience. Many people asked me what I was basing my opinion on. The answer is: My own experience. At one time, I used my body as a way to find acceptance. I thought my breasts were my ticket to love. When I think of the men I allowed to partake in the glory of my breasts who were definitely not worthy of them (with the hopes of finding love), it makes me shudder. But I learned from it. And thankfully those days are long behind me.

You say that’s not your experience? You say that you bared your body and have been treated respectfully and wonderfully by every man you’ve ever met? Congratulations. I’m happy for you. But that was not my experience, and it has not been the experience of many other women.

So, in closing, I hope this clears up any misunderstanding or misinterpretation I may have unintentionally fostered with my blog. Once again, I sincerely apologize to any BBWs who I offended or insulted with my words. My intention was only to help and give what I believe was the best advice to any BBWs looking for love and using their bodies to help them find it.

I have learned a huge lesson here. As a writer, I’d already learned this lesson, but this experience gave me a refresher course on the reality of this concept: Words can be extremely powerful. The slightest nuance can change the well-intentioned into the destructive.

I will do my best from now on to make sure that every blog I write contains only the words that best express my opinions and intentions, and do not unintentionally offend others. This doesn’t mean that I’m going to refrain from expressing my honest opinion, even if it’s unpopular – but I will do my best to make sure that I don’t unnecessarily offend the very people I am trying to help.

Thanks for reading and watching. Stay tuned tomorrow for Part 2, where I deal with the hatred and harassment that resulted from this blog. Believe me – YOU WON’T WANT TO MISS WHAT I HAVE TO SAY!!!!